John 21:1-19

1 After these things Jesus showed Himself again to the disciples at the Sea of Tiberias, and in this way He showed Himself: 2 Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathanael of Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two others of His disciples were together. 3 Simon Peter said to them, “I am going fishing.”They said to him, “We are going with you also.” They went out and immediately got into the boat, and that night they caught nothing. 4 But when the morning had now come, Jesus stood on the shore; yet the disciples did not know that it was Jesus. 5 Then Jesus said to them, “Children, have you any food?” They answered Him, “No.” 6 And He said to them, “Cast the net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some.” So they cast, and now they were not able to draw it in because of the multitude of fish. 7 Therefore that disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, “It is the Lord!” Now when Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on his outer garment (for he had removed it), and plunged into the sea. 8 But the other disciples came in the little boat (for they were not far from land, but about two hundred cubits), dragging the net with fish. 9 Then, as soon as they had come to land, they saw a fire of coals there, and fish laid on it, and bread. 10 Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish which you have just caught.” 11 Simon Peter went up and dragged the net to land, full of large fish, one hundred and fifty-three; and although there were so many, the net was not broken. 12 Jesus said to them, “Come and eat breakfast.” Yet none of the disciples dared ask Him, “Who are You?”—knowing that it was the Lord. 13 Jesus then came and took the bread and gave it to them, and likewise the fish. 14 This is now the third time Jesus showed Himself to His disciples after He was raised from the dead.

15 So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Feed My lambs.” 16 He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My sheep.” 17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep. 18 Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.” 19 This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.”

I wrote this poem in an attempt to describe this scene from Peter's perspective:

Lord please guide me through this maze.
I am just sitting here in a daze.
Did I ever do anything right?
Did I help You at all that night?
No! We were cowards, Andrew and me.
Why would You choose men such as we?
I did try to fight.
I cut off a man’s ear that first night.
But You said it wasn’t right
You told me to walk in the Light
You told us You would die.
John didn’t stop it, nor did I.
The only thing I did was lie
I did nothing but watch You die
Though You called me Your friend.
I let You down till the very end.
The bold statements I made.
But they so quickly fade…

I know I don’t need to know why,
And if it’s not You it’s a lie.
Still I hopelessly wonder.
And these questions I ponder.
To whom shall we go? Again I pray.
Only You are the Truth, the Life and the Way.
But now Lord, I need to know.
What is my fate and where shall I go?
Am I a vessel prepared for destruction?
For these sins of fear and presumption?
Or was I made for mercy and Your glory?
What will be the end of my story?

So tired of this anguish, we went to cast
Our nets in the sea, so we wouldn’t fast.
We went to the boat that we knew so well.
But we caught nothing, not even a shell
All night we tried and tried.
Exhausted, “I have had it!” I cried.
There was a man on the shore that John first saw
He was calling out and mocking us all
He said “Have you caught any fish tonight boys?”
I said “Sir, it’s bad enough without your noise”
He warmly smiled and then replied,
Try casting the net on the other side!
Why we listened, I do not know.
But when we did there was quite a show
There were more fish than we could ever haul
The boats would not even hold them all
The thought then hit me just like a board.
John nodded and said, “It is the Lord!”
They called me a fool when I jumped in the sea.
But I couldn’t let IT separate Him from me
I put on my coat and I left them there.
My only thought was does He still care?

When at last I reached the beach
I saw Him there, preparing a feast.
I felt better but I still didn’t know
What He would say or how this would go.
Then He asked me to answer Him, please
“Simon, Son of Jonah, Do you love Me more than these?"
But I just couldn’t answer because of my pride
I wanted to say YES but something stopped me inside
I just couldn’t be bold after all of those failures
So I mumbled, “Lord, come on, You know my prayers.”
“Feed my lambs”, was all He replied.
And what that meant I couldn’t decide.
He made me repeat it two more times
I didn’t blame Him, but I really did mind.
Does my love fall short? Please don’t let THAT be
But I wasn’t sure because, you know, only He can see.
And just when I thought I would NEVER be free,
He said those wonderful words, “Peter, follow Me.”

Now, I may have stumbled at every turn
But He is full of forgiveness as you too can learn.
He knows your failures but He is very wise
He makes you do better, He doesn’t criticize
Answer His call and you will see
Perfection is not the point for you or for me
His love exceeds knowledge for one and all
His peace passes understanding when you answer His call
He strengthens your spirit to perform any task
He is able to do more than you can think or ask
And then when you hear again how He died,
Trade your guilt for assurance that you’re on the inside!